hello everyone... sorry for now bloggin for SIX DAYS thank u very much for remindin me char...
i've been really busy lately so therefore i couldnt blog...
anyway, things has been rough lately, a stable relationship to a unstable one, how could that have happened? i learnt something.... we must adapt... situations change... emotions run wild.... and well, it was the hardest few weeks to past... i really didnt know what to do.... i thought many times i knew what to do, but it didnt seem like it changed anything, maybe things even got worse... My mum partly is to blame, she, i dunno, shes just tying me down and chaining me up... just like on a cloudy day, using an umbrella to shelter me from the sun! I've been pissed almost everynight with her shit, no u cant do this, u cant do tt... what am i? a 5 year old retarded half paralysed deaf and blind boy? cmon, treat me like any other 15 yr old... gah, guess it'll nv happen anytime soon... well, things was bad, really bad, and every little thing became such a big issue, start fighting over misunderstandings, small silly things... mostly my fault la, but also is just the tension very high... i nv though about so many things before... my mind was running wild, the tension was building by the minute.. Then, i made a promise.... i'll put in double and if need be triple effort to get out of this mess and let us all be happy and jolly once agin... and as i always say, its difficult, not impossible... and nv give up one something ure alr halfway on... why give up now? with a little more effort u can push through, if u give up, why waste ur time in the first place, shouldnt even have started... so then, last night, i stayed till 3, i really thought about what to do, im gonna start anew, no more nonsense, if this is what i really wan then im gonna continue, persevere and last forever.... i learnt my lesson, dun start something u cant handle... Life is complicated if u see it that it is complicated... but it is really simple actually, do wat u supposed to do, and do it well... So i thought what i am to do, and i will do it and do it well... If its something i love, why waste it away.... So today, i met her, everythings settled alr, and we are all happy... Sometimes i wonder, did God purposely make our lives not perfect. Imagine a perfect life, would we even know the emotion of hate, anger, sadness, bitterness......? And what about love? Would it exist? Back to reality, it is not perfect, we fall, we pick ourselves up, we learn from it and move on.... Whats the point of falling, getting up, and standing where u fell and find fault with that floor and don't learn anything? Its really stupid to do that.... I even came to conclude that all this little fights and arguements has actually brought us closer, our love stronger.... We learn from each other's mistakes, not doing it again, we would be much happier... I rather make a mistake now, then later part of my life where its sometimes harder to pick myself up... So thank u, thank u for showing my the right way....
Yesterday i went to my grandparent's house after dinner... My grandfather took out a old tape, it was a present from all the kids for father's day 1967... All my uncles and mother sang and played the various instruments and songs they or my Grandfather liked... It was a very nice piece of work, although it was old and the songs were not like the songs nowadays, but the songs i hafta admit was nice... i nv heard them before but it was nice... And i think thats where i got my talent from, my Grandfather... Oh, and there was one song, "goodbye my love" which was sung by my dad, i burst out laughing throughout the song, he was desperately tryin to stay in pitch... It was so funny, but although the outcome wasnt near perfect, the effort was there, he did put in effort to sing for my grandfather, and that is much appreciated more than the outcome... This is something that is slowly getting lost in the world nowadays... Its always about the results, the final mark... And, i learnt about the story of my dad, he was nice, always happy person... But then after he mixed with some of the americans in his company, and after we went thailand many times, he changed, he became more violent and arrogant and simply, crazy... Anyway, tts the past, i've alr moved on.... See! i do what i preach.... hahaha...
If some of u didnt know, i grew up with a musical family, my uncles and mum played in a band called gypsy and was very famous in singapore, i think till now there are still fans out there... Anyway, every family gathering theres bound to by music, and i realise that music bonds us all and unites us all... Although now all of em got their own lives and kids, they still have time to play and sing like the old days... And they passed that legacy to us, and its up to us how we use it, whether it is to impress girls or bring happiness to the world... Haha... I have to live my life, i wont dwell on old things and i'll try not to make new ones happen... Its really difficult, but its not difficult... Im gonna persevere... Im gonna make a difference... Im just gonna be me, myself and I! Whether u like it or not! hahaha...
Well, thats all i hafta blog for today... I'll try to blog more consistently and i'll make my post interesting to read... Actually, my life is interesting, its just tt i nv tell... So if u wanna noe, keep track of my blog, i'll pour everything out... haha...
OH YES! yesterday, i went to the eurasion assiociation, my 2nd home sometimes.. i was to film an mtv for the new marine parade song my family re-produced... after that, we went down to the restaurant/bar for tea... And guess who i met, En Lai from Urban Escape... He was doing the Marine parade area and he was filming there, so don't be surprised if u see me on tv in a couple of weeks time... hehehe...
Well thats it... tkcare and to all Sec 4s taking their Os, good luck! esp for ur Amaths tmr! All the best, just do your best and don't regret anything... Its difficult, not impossible.... (:
CHOCOLATE ;;
9:30 PM <3